Monday, October 19, 2015
Relationships are about power. We give some, we take some -- that is the ideal recipe, eh?
Yet, so many of us give up our power to others in a relationship, sometimes out of fear of being alone, or fear of losing security (financial, emotional, sexual). Notice a pattern emerges. We sometimes stay in poor, unhealthy relationships out of fear -- brought on by giving away our own power.
So ? How do we get our power back and put our relationship, or at least our attitudeabout our relationship, back on an even keel?
First ~ Remove the rose colored glasses and see things for what and how they really are. This is a tough one for most of us because we have lived so long under an illusion that there is permanence in a world where permanence just does not exist. Change is a constant in the physical life. Energies continually shift and we are being impacted by these changes every moment of every day. Accepting that 'things' change is step one in returning our power to ourselves -- becoming self-empowered.
Second ~ Finding the right balance. I am saying 'right' balance because balance can be relative or subjective. We often determine balance in a relative way, perhaps estimating it by comparing our perception of balance to someone or something else. Subjective balance is that which is more pointed toward our own personal feel for it - an introspective perception that is biased by our individuality. Which balance is 'right' balance? Right balance is that which serves the good of the whole - plain and simple. And, we are part of that whole.
Third ~ Create a "Me" wall. One sure-fire way of building your confidence and taking back your power is to create a 'Me" wall that contains things you like about yourself, photographs of happy times, prints of special places you love or things that you enjoy. Surround yourself with positive reinforcement, bolstering your confidence by hanging that special certificate you received, your diplomas, certifications, and degrees. Fill your wall with everything positive you have about yourself and ... include a mirror right smack dab in the middle so you can see yourself, too ! Don't feel that this is being egotistical or vain because it is not. It is OK to appreciate your accomplishments. When we lose appreciation for our own success, we effectively diminish our personal power. A "Me" wall reaffirms our self-esteem and re-establishes a belief in our own powers and abilities which equates to self-empowerment, not undue favor of ourselves.
Fourth ~ If the world is a stage, be your own writer, director and star ! Shakespeare said it most poignantly that the world is a stage and that we are all actors (or something akin to this ~smile~). I say ... don't stop at merely being an actor, be your own writer and director, too! You are the product of your thoughts, so include the whole show in your thoughts and create, produce, direct and star in your own life. What fun !
Fifth ~ Utilize the art of visualization to achieve your goals. And, don't be afraid to dream big! Visualization and dreams run along parallel lines. We have hopes and dreams. Now ... take those hopes and dreams and see them visually. Take five or ten minutes every day to create a daydream of your hopes and see them exactly as you would like it. By visualizing your dreams, you give them power, thereby fortifying your self-empowerment. You can also take it a step further into contemplation and not only visualize your dreams, but also incorporate all your senses -- seeing, feeling, hearing, tasting, and smelling.
Sixth ~ Know that every stumbling block is really a stepping stone in disguise. Our perception of things can make all the difference. Sometimes we just need to ask ourselves ... "Is the glass half empty or half full?" You've heard this before, I'm sure, but consider the difference between the two --- emptiness or fullness -- direct opposites. Seeing a glass as half empty is perceived as the glass being deficient and lacking, therefore, of negative value. However, seeing a glass as being half-full is perceived as being abundant and sufficient leaving a positive connotation. Don't allow stumbling blocks to stop your progress; perceive them as stepping stones and flit across them toward your goals without skipping a beat. See the glass as half-full.
Seventh ~ A smile is a curve that doesn't need straightening out. Smile more -- at others, at yourself! Smiling does more than simply stretch your facial muscles. It opens the floodgates of unconditional love and compassion. Share that infectious smile of yours with everyone you meet and keep it on your face daily. Why? Because there is this thing called 'muscle memory' ~~ a physical process where muscle mass becomes familiar with a movement over time and 'memorizes' it as a motor skill. Reminding yourself to smile more every day will make it so that your smile will simply become a permanent part of your life and the effort of smiling, although physical, comes from within the Soul, the 'real' you! Let it out !
By taking back your power .. in your job, your home and your relationships, you begin to emerge as a more confident, successful, and empowered individual --- one who is unafraid to begin or end a relationship. You give yourself the power to make the choice, your own choice, unhindered and uninfluenced by any one other than yourself.
Working with the bagua map is one of the most powerful ways to create positive changes in your life.It focuses your intention to produce astonishing results fast!
As I have stated elsewhere, it is my belief that feng shui works because it both enhances the beneficial energy in your home AND sets a specific intention in place establishing a positive vibration. Working with the bagua map to bring feng shui in the home is like having a playdate between the intellectual and intuitive side of the brain.It focuses your intention to produce astonishing results fast!
The best way to use the feng shui bagua map is as follows:
- Take stock of your life and set goals. The very first thing I do during a consultation is to have my client fill out a life assessment worksheet . This allows me to decide which areas to focus on first.
- Map out the areas of your home using the bagua map. You need to overlay the bagua map onto your home. The goal is to divide your home up into nine equal parts like the feng shui bagua chart.
- Start making adjustments slowly. Based on your life-assessment worksheet, decide which area or areas to focus on first. Be sure the area is clean and free from clutter. Make feng shui adjustments and add enhancements slowly so you can identify what works and what doesn’t.
the feng shui bagua map are:
- Abundance and Prosperity. This area represents wealth, happiness and peace. It also represents fortunate opportunities and your ability to take advantage of them.
- Fame and Reputation. This area represents how others perceive you and how they value and recognize your contributions. It also corresponds to illumination from within, integrity and honesty.
- Relationships and Love. This area represents your relationships with others. It helps you foster long-lasting and harmonious relationships built upon mutual trust and unconditional love.
- Creativity and Children. This area represents joy, fullness, creativity, and imagination. It also signifies your relationship with your children and child bearing.
- Helpful People and Travel. This area represents support, guidance, and love from close friends and unseen helpers. Along with moving and traveling, it also denotes letting go of everything and everyone that doesn’t serve you.
- Career and Journey. This area represents more than your career, it corresponds to your life purpose and the flow of life.
- Skills and Knowledge. This area represents personal strength, wisdom, resourcefulness, self-mastery, and self-control. It also stands for the link between a calm mind and intelligent mind.
- Family and Elders. This area represents strong health, loving family relations, honesty and forgiveness, and the foundations for life.
- Health and Center. This area also stands for health and a balanced life.
A proper feng shui office helps you feel inspired, productive, and powerful. And when done well, feng shui will enhance your creativity, discipline and success. Follow these 6 essential guidelines to make the most of office feng shui:
- Clear clutter and organize.
- Make sure your desk is in the proper place.
- Use appropriate artwork and imagery.
- Balance and harmonize the space.
- Choose suitable feng shui office colors.
- Incorporate stress relievers.
1. Clear clutter and organize.One of the most fundamental steps in creating a feng shui office is to get rid of clutter. If you've read about clutter control then you know that clutter has a profound impact on your emotional, mental, physical, and spiritual well-being. When you clear clutter you bring in vital energy that will help you with mental clarity, focus, and inspiration.
Maintaining an organized office and desk will help you in innumerable ways. It will:
- Increase effectiveness, efficiency and productivity
- Enhance discipline, creativity and success
- Attract abundance
- Improve mental clarity and focus
- Reduce stress and help you to feel more relaxed and peaceful
- Give space for new projects and creative endeavors to flourish
Keep everything that youCreate an organization system that works. You need to establish a personal work-style so that you can maintain a clutter-free, organized office. Keep everything that you use daily within arms reach â€” you shouldnâ€™t have to get up from your desk to perform daily tasks. You should also deal with paper work at least once a week â€” it wonâ€™t be nearly as overwhelming if you do your filing, pay bills, open mail, etc. consistently.
use daily within arms reach.
use daily within arms reach.
Here are a few other things to keep in mind: try to leave your desk clutter-free and organized at the end of the day; donâ€™t overcrowd your bookshelves, it will leave you feeling overwhelmed and overextended; and if your space is cramped, then open it up with mirrors.
2. Make sure your desk is in the proper place.In a feng shui office you want to make sure that you are sitting in the power position. That means that you can see the door when seated at your desk. Ideally, you should be able to see as much of the room as possible. The diagram below illustrates how to place your desk in the power position.
If you have to share your office space with another, you should try to avoid sitting back to back. It is also best to avoid sitting face to face. Both positions tend to create conflict. If you canâ€™t avoid sitting face to face, either stagger the desks or create a small barrier with a plant, photo or other object. Concentrate on acoustical privacyâ€”use headphones and muffle phone conversations.
Word of AdviceDid you know that in feng shui the person seated farthest from the entrance will have the most power?
And of course, your desk should be uncluttered and organized.
3. Use appropriate artwork and imagery.
When you surround yourself with imagesIn a feng shui office you want to surround yourself with images and objects that keep you inspired, creative and productive. Add flowers, art and beautiful window treatments. Hang pictures, mottos and images that symbolize what you want to accomplish. Choose furniture and accessories that speak to you of prosperity, abundance and success.
and objects that you love and that inspire you
you create a living affirmation for your goals.
and objects that you love and that inspire you
you create a living affirmation for your goals.
You can use your feng shui office as a template for what you want to create in your life and work â€” your office and the physical objects within should reflect the transformation you desire. Read more about the law of attraction and environmental psychology.
Infuse your office with your personality—it will foster and support personal growth and success.
4. Balance and harmonize the space.Balance and harmony are important attributes of a feng shui office. There are two ways to balance and harmonize your environment â€” you can either use yin and yang or feng shui elements.
Yin and yang represent feminine and masculine energies. Nourishing energy strikes a balance between the two extreme forces of yin and yang. Let's say for example you worked in an overly yang environment with high ceilings, light colors, angular furniture and lots of natural light. You would need to balance this overly yang environment with some yin energy. You might add curved or flowing shapes, darker colors, soft furniture and some window coverings. Read more about yin and yang energy here.
Feng shui elements represent the natural elements of wood, earth, metal, fire water. It is important that all five elements are represented in your environment. Even more important is that the elements are in balance.
As an example, let us say that you work in a very bright office (the fire element) with an abundance of light colors including metal filing cabinets, computers, faxes, etc. (the metal element). In this case, you would want to focus on bringing in the other elements. You could bring in some plants for the wood element, some earthy colors for the earth element, and an aquarium for the water element.
It doesnâ€™t matter which method you use, it only matters that your space is balanced and harmonious. Choose the system that feels right for you.
The image to the left is a good example of a balanced environment. It has characteristics of all five feng shui elements. The wood element can be seen in the soaring vertical window treatments. The earth element is represented by the horizontal, rectangular furniture as well as the earthy colors and pottery. The fire element is brought in through the natural and artificial lighting and the antler base of the lamp. Finally, the water element can be seen in the mirror and asymmetrical shapes.
Yin and yang are balanced in this environment too. The yang attributesâ€”vertical volumes, light colors, sunlight, hard surfaces, and rectilinear shapesâ€”are tempered by yin characteristics like darker colors, soft drapery, curved forms, and low horizontal surfaces.
5. Choose suitable feng shui office colors.Color has a remarkable impact on your psychological and physical well-being. When choosing feng shui office colors consider the following:
- Which colors are appropriate for a feng shui office space.
- The common psychological effects of color.
- The feng shui bagua and the colors that correspond to each area.
6. Incorporate stress relievers.Keep stress and irritability to a minimum by choosing furniture with rounded corners or positioning sharp corners out of traffic flow. Avoid harsh lighting or lots of glare since it can cause irritability and fatigue. You can also add music, running water or mist with essential oils to keep stress levels to a minimum.
Sunday, October 11, 2015
Aries: Like everything an Aries does, crushes are intense and quick, and they don’t think for too long before they act; the average time that lapses between an Aries developing a crush on someone and asking them out is about an hour.
Taurus: Taureans are masters at hiding their emotions, so while their crush may be undetectable to others, it’s a really intense, all-consuming, insomnia-inducing experience on the inside.
Gemini: Normally chatty Geminis do even more nervous talking (not to mention nervous joke-making!) around the object of their affection. They’ll look for any excuse to strike up a conversation with their crush.
Cancer: Cancers want to be pursued, so while their feelings might be strong, their actions will be subtle and shy: glances from across the room, maybe a flirty text, but nothing too bold!
Leo: Leos turn the charm up to 11 when they have a crush on someone, showering them with flattery and compliments. True fact: if a Leo has a crush on you, it probably won’t be long before you have a crush on them too.
Virgo: Virgos get super nervous around their crushes and analyze every single detail about interaction (“He said hi instead of hey–what does it meeeaan?!”) to try to decide how to proceed.
Libra: Lovey-dovey Libras are usually balancing multiple crushes at once, but their approach is always the same: making sure to look their best around their crush(es), presenting their most positive qualities, and showering their crush with compliments.
Scorpio: A more accurate term for a Scorpio crush would be “all-consuming obsession with a side of light stalking.” Scorpios will secretly find out every possible detail about the person and spend every waking (and dreaming) moment fixating on the object of their affections.
Sagittarius: Competitive Sagittarians approach winning over their crush as if it were a contest. They’ll recruit everyone they know to talk them up whenever their crush is around, and invite their crush to events that allow them to show off their formidable talents.
Capricorn: Capricorns need to know everything about their crushes before they decide whether or not to act on their feelings. They’ll gather info about everything from how much money their crush makes to their political leanings.
Aquarius: When an Aquarian has a crush on someone, they’ll want to become best friends with them, integrate themselves into the person’s social circle, and hang out constantly until the friendship finally becomes something more.
Pisces: It doesn’t take much to send a Pisces to romantic La-La Land, and a crush will definitely do the trick. Pisceans will spend their days daydreaming about their crush, doodling the person’s name with hearts around it, and imagining their perfect future together.